Notes to self...

Natalie is not an easy child right now.  She was.  

In fact, about 19 months ago when I was about to have James, my mother-in-law commented that who wouldn't have more kids when you had a Natalie...she was so fun and easy.  

And then suddenly she wasn't.  

She cries about everything...all day long.

  

She is mischievous.  If you can't see or hear her, it means trouble spelled m-e-s-s.  Marker on the walls, water all over the floor, foamy soap all over the bathroom, nail polish all over her doll house and James' face... 

She does not listen.  At all.  She just chooses to do her own thing and pretends not to hear you.  Or she has a million reasons why she needs to be doing whatever she is doing even after you have asked her not to...several times.  

She runs away.  After running down the street or through the mall at full speed in all my pregnancy glory time after time, I finally figured out that the best thing to do is just call out "We'll see you later." and she comes running...and crying.  

When John and I were buying a car last fall, Suzann, my mother-in-law, came over to watch the kids.  We were driving to the dealership when my phone rang.  It was Suzann.  "Natalie has locked herself in the bathroom and I can't open the door."  Me: "She knows how to unlock the door.  Tell her to unlock the door and come out."  Which of course Suzann did, but Natalie ignored.  I picture her inside the bathroom with a devilish grin on her face as grandma knocks and tries to get her to come out.  Well, Suzann went for help.  She took the boys and went to the neighbor's house to see if they could help her open the bathroom door (it uses those little metal "sticks" to open and is rather tricky. It took me a while to figure it out.).  As she was coming back with reinforcements, Natalie comes running out of the garage, crying.  She did not want to be left behind and as soon as she realized everybody was gone, she opened the bathroom door and came out.  

This girl pushes all the buttons.  

I am convinced it is a stage that she will grow out of (please! be a stage!).  But in the meantime, it is good to catch glimpses of our darling, sweet girl and what I can do as a mom to encourage the sweetness without making her feel like she isn't doing it quite right.  Because sometimes I feel like I'm telling her NOT to do things an awful lot.

A few weeks ago John took Andrew AND James (superdad) camping, leaving Natalie and I to a girls night out.  We went to dinner, rode the carousel at the mall, and met some friends for a movie.  The whole night she held my hand, told me she loved me about every 3 minutes, never ran off. She was darling.  It was so fun.  Note to self...Natalie needs some more one-on-one time.

The other day she was crying (again...for no reason) and wanting me to hold her.  I said, "Natalie, do you want to help me make pizzas for dinner?"  She immediately stopped crying, said she needed to put on the napkin (the apron) Grandma Larraine had sent her, and was so helpful and cute the entire time we were getting the pizza and breadsticks made.  Note to self...Natalie likes to feel needed and helpful.

And tonight.  She had gotten out of bed several times (her usual routine at night, even though she is exhausted because she will not nap during the day).  I took her back up to her room and tucked her in.  She looked at me, "Mom, can you lay in my bed with me?"  Some nights I just want everyone in bed because it is the ONLY moment of the day where I can be alone with my thoughts.  But tonight I laid down by her and she turned on her side and put her arm around my pregnant belly and waist and tucked her little head up against me.  And every once in a while she would pat me with her little hand.  

And I lay there loving my little terror.  And loving my sweet daughter.  Note to self...Natalie needs lots of love...and she gives lots of love.